Let me first begin by saying this 100% not a ‘how to’ post. By no means do I feel I’ve mastered the momming + working game. Some days I feel pretty good about the balance and would even go so far as to say I feel like I’m getting a little bit of the best of both worlds. I love working and having a career. I love being successful. I find immense empowerment in supporting my clients and helping them better their business. There is a part of me that craves the technical, mathematical, problem-solving and social part of business. But I also absolutely love being a mom. There is nothing more heart-melting than when my baby boy kisses me on the lips or snuggles with me as he’s drifting off to sleep.
But in order to make the momming + working merry-go-round function, I’ve had to employ a lot of help. And the weeks that I’m traveling it’s a LOT of help; from nannies to my mother-in-law, to extra daddy duty and/or sometimes even flying down to Portland so I can leave Aspen with my mom. Managing my travel schedule with my husbands and then the nannies and Grannie(s) has become an additional part time job, and not a welcomed one!
And it’s a constant check-in;
· Am I making the right decision working and traveling so much?
· Could I have taken more time with him today?
· Should I have gone to music class with him rather than scheduling 2 conference calls instead?
· Other moms are taking their babes to swimming lessons, we should definitely be going to swimming lessons!
· Is it safe to be drinking this much coffee when breastfeeding?? (I’m not still breastfeeding, but please believe that when I was, it was a little caffeinated!)
So here is what I think: if your heart’s desire is to chase your career, but you also want to be a mom, that is SO A-OK! Our society isn’t catered to help us tackle both, but that doesn’t mean it’s time to let the mom-guilt set in and just be resigned to our fate that it’s either/or. No way Jose! You have that desire to chase your career or your dream because that’s a part of who you are in your innermost being and how beautiful is it to show your child by example what it’s like to work hard for something you that inspires you?!
But don’t forget; it takes a village. Seriously. Make sure you have ample help to conquer your Superwoman goals and be gracious to yourself. If help isn’t readily landing at your feet (Spoiler Alert: I find it rarely does), be bold about seeking it be that from family, friends, nanny, daycare. You need support to be a superhero.
I am super excited to share the next chapter for me and our little family; I am taking a much needed pause from the crazy travel-filled schedule I have found to be my life in order to give our family 100% of mommy. Answering to an 18-month old CEO (terrifying?!) This will be the very first time in Aspen’s life that I’m not traveling every other week and working on emails or calls all day while he plays nearby and is cared for by someone other than me.
This may sound contradictory to my working + momming philosophy, but it’s not. And here’s why; I knew it was time for this Season defined by crazy working and mayhem to change. Life is dynamic and so we have to allow for these changes, right? I have some exciting keep-me-up-at night passions that I want to pursue, and life, in no uncertain terms, gave me every signal that it was time to make this change.
It has been bittersweet leaving the clients and team that I worked with so tirelessly, and sacrificed so much of my precious time with my husband and babe to help build that business. But I’m looking forward to and daydreaming about our future which will be more working + momming, but of a very different sort.
And with that I leave you with the poignant words of Queen Bey, “Who Run the World? Girls!”
Happy International Women’s Day!